On the living room floor

For those of you with kids, the first time you’re trying to teach your kid hide-and-go-seek and they just lay on the floor and close their eyes. Because they can’t see you, you can’t see them. That’s how they’re thinking. That’s how you’re thinking spiritually right now. You’re just like, 'Come find me, come find me.' You’re on the living room floor. --Matt Chandler, of The Village, a church in Flower Mound, Texas, in the first of a multi-part sermon on Colossians

So I picture this: I'm fucking lying here on our dirty rug. I'm just lying there, on this disgusting rug that used to be beige and orange and is now gray and orange, that hasn't been washed or vacuumed or shaken out or brushed off since the beginning of the semester, and I'm pretending nobody, least of all God, knows that I'm falling apart.

--

I went biking again, for hours, until not just my toes but my feet were all numb. I thought: when you stand up on the pedals, as you're going downhill so you don't have to worry about peddling and swaying from side to side, if you just spread your featherless arm-wings, it's as close as you'll ever get to flying.